Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Mr.Jones and Me, and Shorty McShort-short

Boy I really did it this time. I cannot deny you the story no matter how humiliating since I had to bring it up. But the whole theme of this story is speaking too soon, with just a dash of having weird stuff on your shoulders. On with it.
One afternoon in August as I was preparing for company, I heard a knock at the front door. Before I could even set my sights into the hallway, the kids had answered it and were well into their usual four-headed interrogation process of the poor soul on the porch. Peering through the 8-armed beast I managed a "hello there, can I help you?" as I had never seen this presumably hip guy at my door or anywhere else. Nicely enough he says something like 'yea, I was hoping I could talk to you a minute regarding Joseph'. (Uh-oh.) "Sure", I say and usher the little investigative team back into the house with not a small verbal struggle, and step out for a chat.
He introduces himself as Steve Bowman, which sounded vaguely familiar, but I was more intent on hearing about how my son had apparently been teasing his little girl on the school bus and he just thought he should stop by and talk about it. Of course I felt horrible (yet surprised cause Joseph's the nice one) and apologized and let him know that Joseph would be talked to. Among the offenses was tripping her, trying to make her get off the bus at the wrong stop, and calling her "Shorty McShort-short" which he quoted with a slight grin and which immediately made me cringe because I've heard this verbal abuse in our house before. He insisted it wasn't a big deal and that he just wanted to say hello in hopes that it would stop because his little girl was upset.

designer.accessories
I continued to apologize and sympathize and let him know that both our boys had been at the other end of a bit of bullying on the bus so I understand. I also told him how nice it was of him to stop by in person to talk and how lots of parents don't do that sorta thing. We got to talking which led to trading occupation information. He said he's in the music industry (very common in these parts) and they just moved from CA. It gets a little fuzzy right after I asked him who he's played for, because the COUNTING CROWS flew out of his mouth ::My favorite. My college years. My inspirational music in my first I'm-an-adult-now-and-have-my-own-art-studio studio. The music I was convinced was written for me because I kept hearing "Anna" and "Maria" and "Picasso" and zillions of color references. And as it happens, the band that in-utero Joseph danced to in my belly during their concert:: Like I said, fuzzy. And ya know what, I told him all that-well mostly the Adam writing lyrics for me part. He was amused and unpretentious and glad for it. So, kindly he asked me what I did. Said I was a designer and he (even) pointed to my neck/shoulder area and said "textiles?" I replied "yea" with an open mouth grin like how did you know. Then I remembered I had fabric on one shoulder and a tape measure around my neck. Anyway. Yea. I was cool, baby, cool. The above picture shows my fashion accessories of choice when I answered the door. Nice, nice guy and he said his wife would love to meet me, etc, we exchanged info and joked that we were glad Joseph was a stinker to his daughter.

Oh yea, back to the little bullying thing. So I talked to Joseph who denied through very strenuous tears that he even knew who this little girl was and that he ever did anything mean to anyone. We talked for a really long time and I was convinced he was telling the truth especially after the sibling co-bus-riders backed up his story. Also, there is apparently another Joseph on the bus. Hmmm.
So I emailed Steve and his wife to let them know how the questioning went down and that maybe there is another Joseph that needs talking to, etc. and say that its hard for me to have Joseph write an apology when I'm sure he's telling the truth, he has the habit of being very honest so on and so on. There. All better. Jeff comes home and I begin with 'you're never gonna guess who I met today' and for some weird reason he's totally concerned with why he was there and foolishly passing up the simple exciting fact that he was there. I mutter something quickly like "hrmmerniminuh JOSEPH thigsallmoo BULLY shumana DAUGHTER" trying to get on with the important part and he immediately sets dad-eyes on Joseph who is behind me obediently putting away clean silverware. "JOSEPH did you do any of that?!" And I swear I must have felt the spit of the second round of tears against my back but this time it was accompanied with a "YES I DID ALL THAT STUFF. I'M SOOOORRRrrryyy" Blah Blah Blah. Can you imagine!? I was so understanding yet firm (I thought) in my questioning and he completely pulled the wool over me! All Jeff had to do was ask in that 6foot5 voice of his and an instant confession appears out of no where like rain after a drought.
Ashamed, Joseph and I both had to go and write our apologies. Both were accepted. Nice, nice people. And my husband? I love him. He really has written songs about me and I love those too.
whew. kids.
Anna Maria

53 comments:

  1. Wowsers! It's the power of the Dad voice, I think they use it less then Moms so when they speak. EVVvvvery one stops and listens. Even if it's just "pass the mustard". Cool story.

    ReplyDelete
  2. christie12:45 PM

    you have made my day, i am so glad to hear that these kinds of things happen in other homes as well as my own. i mean the bullying/confession/choas part, not the counting crows part, that is just too good to be true, i wonder if i would have been able to pick my jaw up off the ground to even continue talking? either way, good job!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Anna, what a story!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. What a great story! And Dad's do have a way of getting the "whole" story out of our boys. Doesn't seem fair, does it?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sandi Henderson1:27 PM

    No no no way. I don't even know which part to comment on, so I'll just say I'm going to be thinking about that one all day! :)

    Sandi

    ReplyDelete
  6. I love this story! And I love August and everything after too!

    ReplyDelete
  7. that has to be such a sureal memory. i would feel like i had dreamed it all up.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Great story Anna! I mean bad reason...but Great Story!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Now that is LIFE. Great story. Thanks for the laughter and humanity of it all...

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is the funniest story!

    ReplyDelete
  11. i'm always a sucker when my children lie to me too. i flat out saw my daughter do something and she lied her way out of it somehow for a few minutes until i reminded myself again that i SAW her do it!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Great story - thanks for sharing it!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Fantastic story - so glad you've got it all recorded now!

    ReplyDelete
  14. What a great story and it must have been a bit surreal for you. I mean come on the counting crows. jeez, who meets people like that. boys ugh, we just had a similar incident but it was lying about homework we were suckered hook line and sinker until a little email from his teacher surfaced. Straightened that out. Life with kids..fun stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Oh my goodness! That is too funny! It's amazing what kind of confessions Dads can get out of kids with just a look. I'm not so lucky. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  16. Seriously?! Amazing, and embarrasing, and funny. When life happens it sure can be a crazy ride! :) Thanks for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
  17. that is the greatest story ever!

    ReplyDelete
  18. oh my gosh do i love this story......and any parent can relate...just change the names!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Oh my what a story! The power of the 6ft 5in voice. It works wonders in our house too!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Holy Crap - about every part of this story!

    ReplyDelete
  21. I don't know if I would be spanking my child or giving him High fives...I mean really, of all little girls to pick on....Steve Bowman's little girl. How fun. One day he will be telling all his pals about it. Cute story. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  22. What is so amazing about this is to see that you can get ga-ga over someone whose work and art you love. I get all excited when I open this blog because I swear you get 48 hours in your day to my 24, and you are so creative, your house so groovy, your kids so darn cute and I'm just the biggest fan...so it's good to see that you can get all stoked too. Loved it!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Fun stuff! At least he was nice. I'm a huge counting crows fan too!

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is my first visit and I felt instant bond with you, having a young son who has an impish side, as I think many boys do. His humor or zest for life and trouble is not always appreciated by teachers or principals (who knew you could visit the principal in kindergarten!).

    He is a delightful little boy who seems to be in all the wrong places, saying or doing the wrong things at just the moment a teacher walks by. Sometimes misunderstood, sometimes not thinking, sometimes laughing at things that shouldn't be laughed at (who knew bodily parts and strange noises could be so amusing).

    He is always keeping me on my toes trying to sort out the reported incidents and trying to decide to whether to punish for the offense or reward for truthfulness. And forever trying to read body language and clues as to what exactly the truth was.

    Thanks for the fun real life drama.

    You have a lovely blog, full of inspiration!

    Melissa

    ReplyDelete
  25. Anonymous7:37 PM

    How honest of you to admit your misunderstanding of the situation. I did the same thing, except reversed. I asked a neighbor casually about his son being mean to my son on the bus. She called me the next day saying that her son swore he had never been mean to mine. So when I questioned my son further, he said, "No Mommy, the OTHER Austin!" So I had to apologize for that. Also, with you on the song namesake thing. The song "Beth" from KISS was written for me (granted a year before my actual birth....but still...)

    ReplyDelete
  26. Anonymous8:56 PM

    I had a good laugh!! HELLO Jeff, drummer for Counting Crows!! Way to go Joseph! Anna, i have this cute little girl that would love to hoist herself on that shoulder w/that cute piece of fabric-she may even leave a little "present" on it for you!-kathy

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous12:16 AM

    File this memory for when they're teenagers and less apt to buckle under pressure! And definitely kiss your husband!

    ReplyDelete
  28. i'm so jealous!!

    jen

    ReplyDelete
  29. heee. also, you totally neglected to mention Perfect Blue Buildings...<3

    i saw the Crows last September, headlining for the Goo Goo Dolls and Eliot Morris (double love), and i thought "okay, concert buddy who drove me here. i paid for our tickets, so whether you like the Crows or not, we're sitting through them, so i can get my money's worth!"...and i'm glad i did. Rain King live is an amazing experience. heck. they all are. <333333

    in other NON-CROWS commentary, i'd like to say, wow, i would have totally believed your son. i am SUCH a sucker. kids are funny.

    wonder if he got the Shorty McShort-short thing from that new 5 minute cartoon they play on Disney Channel :( (although, i am totally one for making up names like that...Stinky McStink Pants and such...it's terrible :P)

    ReplyDelete
  30. What a great story and how scary must Jeff be to get such an immediate confession!! That's Dads for you. Thanks for sharing and lurve your shoulder decorations - very becoming x

    ReplyDelete
  31. LOL.... No wonder you were reluctant to share that story, But we're so glad you did!!

    ReplyDelete
  32. What a classic story. Thanks for enduring a little embarrassment to bring that to us. Fun. I, also, think I have a handle on the parenting/discipline thing until Daddy comes home. But it makes for a nice balance. Happy Thursday!

    ReplyDelete
  33. We call it the "Voice of Doom" in our house when hubby gets upset. I have "The Mom Look" mastered, but he has the voice. Of course, we haven't had to test it much with only a 15 month old!

    ReplyDelete
  34. A neat story AM! It's neat how things work out, eh?

    ReplyDelete
  35. Daddies have a way, don't they!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Anonymous11:54 AM

    Wow! I was holding my breath thru your whole story. It was like reading a good book. My emotions were on a roller coaster ride....from OMGoodness! you met Steve Bowman, to Ahh! your sweet little guy is so innocent (yes, I have one of those too! they have such innocent little faces.) then to EEks! he was the one who did it. Then finally to that sigh of releaf that everything ended "Happily Ever After". Thanks for the cute story...you made me laugh. (P.S. I'm not a blogger yet...so busy with my new shop "The Blue Egg" Cottage Nest Interiors, my 2 kids and my sweet hubby. I love to read them but can't find the time to set up my own. Loving your fab fabric in Pennsylvania. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Awesome story, Anna! I'm impressed that he stopped by to calmly talk with you about the situation. And that your husband can get a confession with just a look ;)

    ReplyDelete
  38. Julia4:10 PM

    Great story.

    Julia

    ReplyDelete
  39. ha ha ha ha.... I am laughing out loud!!!! We have these moments (minus the Crows) at our house all the time!! I'm glad to know that I'm not the only Mom who sometimes gets fooled. My husband and I find that lying is worse than any transgression they do and therefore worse punishment will follow. BUT...my son has yet to understand that!!!

    ReplyDelete
  40. o, that's a goooooood story! and even more so because aside from all the fab rock-star stuff, the same happened at a confession meeting here once upon a time many years ago. i was totally snookered, her dad asked one question and got a complete and instantaneous reversal and confession! i think we always want to believe it couldn't be our sweeties doing anything wrong- and they know that about us. thanks for sharing that great tale! xoC

    ReplyDelete
  41. I MUST comment on this one!! How AWSOME would that be?!?!?! But to have your little angel pull the wool over your eyes!! LOL LOVE all of your goodies...LOVE the bright colors...I needed something like that to give my creative juices and boost!! You see, I paint furniture, and sometimes my creativity gets in a rut! I'm much more whimsical than my mother, in my choice of color and patter...to me...the more the BETTER!! Thanks for the laught and the inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  42. I am just smiling. What a great story. Yes, daddy's do have some sort of power in getting the truth out.

    ReplyDelete
  43. That's awesome! Great story! I always vowed that my husband and I would have the exact same power with our kids and that it would be unacceptable for them to act differently with Mom than Dad. Ha. Seven years in to this parenting gig, I am now treating the Dad/ Mom thing as an *asset*. That's why he and I are a *team*, differnt strengths, weaknesses, and different ways with the kids.

    ReplyDelete
  44. What a fantastic story! (I love Counting Crows too - so can only imagine how surreal that conversation must have been) - it reminded me of my own embarrassing encounter with a rock legend that I mistook for being one of my father's friends (eek!)...I've blogged it today, so thank you for the reminder and the inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  45. just read yours-hysterical!
    I can imagine ole Pete would be cute in real life :)
    AM

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous10:22 PM

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Oh my...I would be thrilled if I had the same encounter.
    That CD defined like 3 years for me.....

    ReplyDelete
  48. sad but sweet and oh can I relate! It is cool that you had a brush with fame though, nothing like that happens around here. My sis lives in Franklin TN and her daughter goes to school with the son of the lead singer to Slaughter (from the 80's). It's just no biggie there.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Small world, we also went to preschool with the Slaughters (its their last name)!
    along with Martina McBride's and Faith Hill's kids. I have a long list of local celeb spottings here and there. I think they like being left alone, which is pretty easy to do in Nashville/Franklin.
    xo, AM

    ReplyDelete
  50. Great story...bittersweet loving those little boys. I just found your blog, BEAUTIFUL...I didn't even know that you designed the fabric that I just had to have the other day. Yay you!

    ReplyDelete